My 13 year old son has begun his adventures in the dating world recently and his Mom and I watch with great interest how he will go about determining who he feels comfortable dating from an ethnicity or skin color standpoint. We are completely open to whomever he chooses, assuming they are smart, good people, and have never indicated any preference to him or his sister on picking people based on ethnicity. Indeed we have made it clear that who they like should have nothing to do with skin color or ethnicity. But kids have their own minds so we have always wondered how he would respond when the time came.
Our kids are in a very mixed school in the Los Angeles area, with literally a multitude of ethnic groups in the school. I am told there are over 25 native languages being spoken by kids at the school. So it is truly multicultural. And there are also a decent number of Mixed kids in the school as well. So the choices are many.
We are pleased to note that as far as we can tell he has been completely open to his choices. His first girlfriend was a Vietnamese-American girl, though that relationship petered out quickly as is the case all too often in middle school. And soon thereafter he announced his new girlfriend, who happened to be a White American girl. I suspect this relationship will not last all that long, as I think this is just part of the process at their age, dating simply meaning they like each other, since they don’t really go anywhere together other than the mall as part of a group of friends. And I suspect he will make his way through a variety of skin tones and ethnicities before he finally settles on the right one. And that is the process I guess.
But the good news for his Mom and I is to see that he and his circle of friends seem to place no particular value on skin color and therefore their choices and world are wide open, leaving them a chance to pick their love interests on no other basis than that they like one another. Thank goodness things are changing for his generation. There is hope for the future.